I love my hands!!!

Little toes

Cruz is in a really good mood today. He just woke up from his nap. He's having a blast wiggling around in the bouncer and kicking his legs. He is very happy since the mittens were taken off. Now he is sticking his fingers in his mouth if he can't find his pacifier. Okay, got to get back to Cruzer. He is cracking me up today!

Pictures from 4.27 thru 4.29

Smiles
Grandma Sue
Great Aunt Janet
First party
More smiles

First road trip

We made it to DFW without any problem. I was quiet the entire 3 hr 40 min and Cruz slept the entire way. Lets hope tomorrow goes as smoothly. We spent the night at my moms house. I barely slept because Cruz is a noisy sleeper. We are heading to Sarah's baby shower in a bit. After we are spending the night at Autumn and Stephens house. Tomorrow, on our way home, we're going to stop by Grandma Cake's house for Cruz to meet Poppy and Grandpa David. Pics to come!

Bed buddy

Well I am pretty tired today. Last night Cruzer was in a bad mood so I spent about about 2 hours getting him to calm down and go to sleep. I was up 3 times last night to feed him. At the 4:30am wake up I actually woke up. I received an email from stroller strides about my geographic analysis for my franchise. I couldn't stop thinking about that and about day care etc. I have a lot of emotions about going back to work and leaving Cruz for someone else to look after. This is not public yet but I think I am going to stay at home with Cruz and go forward with SS. More to come on this one. Cruz and I napped from 9 to 10:30. Thankfully. I was exhausted. He went down again at 12:30 and slept almost 3 hours! Right now he's eating. I plan on going on a long walk in a bit. I tried to put him in the Ergo Baby carrier but he wasn't having it. And the Moby wrap that I bought last week isn't successful either. I wish he liked to be "worn".

Here are some pics from today :)

My little boy did great at his 2 month check up

I woke Cruz up from his nap and quickly dashed to his doctors appointment. He was in a good mood showing off his sweet side. He was extra cuddly with me which of course I love. He showed the doctor that he was cooing, responding to us talking to him. He is in the 90th percentile for weight and in the 50th percentile for his height and head. And then the dreaded shots came. He did really good all things considered. I almost cried along side him. He spit out some of the oral vaccination mainly because he was so upset from the other 3 shots. Once we were done I stayed in the room with him and fed him. He needed it. He calmed down enough for me to go to the grocery store and drive home without him waking up. I even moved him from his car seat to his swing. He opened his eyes and cooperated but then immediately shut his eyes to sleep.

Cruz I know that was hard for you today. I know you don't understand why you were poked at today but it's for your health. Mommy and Daddy love you very much and we are proud of you!

First pair of shoes!

Before Cruz's 2 month checkup!

Mr Snorey Pants

I normally tell Brian to roll over when he's snoring. I could hear my dad snore so loud growing up that I would bang on the walls (yes, I'm terrible!). My brother Matt drove me crazy in Yellowstone snoring that he had to let me borrow his noise canceling headphones. And I nudge my cat Mikey when he is snoring. Cruz will probably be the only person to snore around me and I won't find it annoying. Instead I think it's cute! I love this baby!

6 hours of sleep is a good night

I didn't really understand how tired I would be until I became a mom but surprisingly, although I complain about it, I don't mind. Sure I absolutely hate it when I can't console Cruz. Sometimes he has a hard time going back to sleep because his tummy hurts! Last night though I fed him 3 times and two out of the 3 times he would call asleep on my chest. That is the sweetest moment for me because we both are happy and content. I'm so glad Brian's ex Kelly let up borrow the bouncer. I didn't think this was necessary when I registered. Well I love it. It's light so I can take it from room to room. He will play in it but also sleep in it. Currently he's in it next to me in bed. We ate both looking forward to a nap.

He has his 2 month check up today at 2. Pray for both of us. He has to get a lot of shots. I'm scared and sad for him.

On a brighter note I think he's 14 pounds. No wonder my upper body hurts. I'm not used to carrying around this kind of weight. :)

Happy Tuesday!!!

My little night light

I just have to post this so I can remember as years pass. Tonight Cruz fell asleep in the bouncer. It was pretty easy to move him to the swing. Right now I'm listening to him cooing in his sleep.

Son - you are adorable and always make me smile. Love you more than I could have ever dreamed of. Xo - Mom

Sleepy time part 3!!!

Gosh Cruzer! More sleep! I just fed him for 20 minutes and then he fell asleep again. I love when he's cuddling like this! Sweet baby!

Happy Tummy

Cruz woke up with gas. I am using the Happy Tummy belt to help him. He's super tired because he fell asleep again.

I wasn't even putting him down for a nap!

Top of the morning to ya!

Cruz had a hard time going to sleep yesterday afternoon. I think he took a 30 minute nap where he's normally up 2 hours and is down for an hour or two all throughout the day. I felt so bad because he was rubbing his eyes and got to that point where he was so tired he was cranky and hyper. He would shut his eyes for 5 to 10 minutes and then would be up again. We went on a walk for at least an hour last night. We came home and I gave him a bath. He was pretty quiet at this point. Then something switched. I tried to feed him since he calms down and goes to sleep while nursing although evenings can be challenging. He started crying and wouldn't stop. Brian came downstairs and took over. It breaks my heart hearing Cruz so stressed out. He ended up going to sleep at 8:30 and slept till 1:30. He slept another stretch till 5:30. He was up into 6ish but then slept till 7:3. Although its not an 8 hour stretch I don't expect that anymore. I know now he needs to feed a couple of times/ night. He woke up in a good mood. Right now I'm working on his first nap if the day :). Happy Monday!!!

Sleepy Happy Baby

Another sweet picture of Cruz sleeping!

Lazy Sunday

I normally start my day out with coffee, bagel, and fruit. Nothing different today except Brian picked up Starbucks for me instead of me making coffee. He didn't question why he was getting it but truthfully it's because I'm out of my good Trader Joes coffee. While Cruz was down for his morning nap I decided to rest too. I think I got about 30 extra minutes of sleep. As most of you know that is good since I rarely take naps! Cruzer got up about 30 minutes ago. He nursed for 11 minutes and then fell asleep on my stomach. He's still here making his sweet little noises and adorable sleep faces. I'm not in any hurry to wake him. These are the moments that I love. Happy Sunday!

4.20.13 Sleepy time!

4.19.13 - 7 weeks and 1 day old!

Our journey - Mother + Son 

4.19.13
1:18 p.m.
Cruz is napping and I'm finally feeling like I can get something done.  I took a shower.  These days I try to jump in when he's asleep.  This proves to be challenging because he may look asleep but that could change in a heart beat.  I've read a million books on sleeping lately and have learned that it takes a long time before they are in a deep sleep which means when they are drifting off to sleep beware - you might jinx yourself and think that they are down for the count.  Trust me - this happens to me a lot.  I get in that HOT shower for a little R&R and they bam - WAAAAAH!!!  I get out.  Put his "binky" in and get back into the shower.  2 minutes go by and I think I'm good again then - WAAAAH!!!!!!  On and on we go. 
Lately though we've settled into more of a routine.  2 hours up and then 2 hours down.  If he's up for longer I know I'm in for it.  He gets hyper and moody and then it takes forever to get him to sleep.  I don't want to sound like I'm complaining.  I'm not.  Although I might be if it's 5 a.m. and he's up!  Aside from the lack of sleep I'm very happy with my baby boy.  He's by far more than I could have ever dreamed of.   

Flash back to 2.28.13
This was our official due date.  Aside from the restless nights, back pain, heart burn, and not being able to breathe real well at the end of my 40 weeks of pregnancy - my pregnancy went really well.  I was paranoid most of the way through since I needed to make it to 38 weeks for my "good" maternity leave with my company and because of the fact that I was very premature only weighing 4.5 pounds.  I wanted a healthy baby boy!  Ask and we shall receive.
Cruz was not really interested in coming out any time soon.  He was cozy in my tummy which is why I scheduled to be induced on 2.28.13 if he didn't come sooner.  That day came.  I called the hospital at 4 a.m. to see when I could come in.  They said they would call me back.  DANG!  I wanted to have him today I thought! Everyone was enroute to Houston and what if?!?  Well I got that call at 11 a.m.  We quickly showered and rushed to the hospital.  I can't leave out the fact that Brian got into some crazy car battle with some guy on 610.  Anyway, we showed up and checked in.  I was so scared.  I couldn't believe my life was about to change and so drastically.  I was scared for the labor.  I was scared if I had to have a c-section.  I was scared that my fabulous doctor wasn't going to be there.  I was scared, nervous, and excited.  I was about to be a MOM!  I couldn't believe it was coming.  Dr. Pinell broke my water.  That hurt like hell.  I was literally peeing all over myself for a couple of hours.  My BFF Rex and my family began to arrive.  I was given the meds to start my contractions.  Eventually I got the epidural.  That was scary too but I'm glad I got it.  Although I was in labor I no longer minded that I was peeing all over myself.  I wasn't really in pain either.  Fast forward to 9 p.m. I was still in labor and waiting for Dr. Pinell.  He was in the middle of deliverying another baby in a different hospital.  I was stressed - I wanted him to be here.  I had a great labor nurse that assured me that he would be here.  He finally showed up around 9:30.  That's when everyone was escored out of the room except for Brian, Rex, the labor nurse Jody and Dr. Pinell.  He said I was fully dialated and ready to go.  I pushed for about 10 minutes.  I thought I was pushing but again with the epidural I really wasn't sure.  I guess I did because before I knew it we were greated by CRUZ!!!!!!!  I'm tearing up just thinking about it.  My baby boy!  He was 8.15 oz and 21.5 inches long.  A big boy!  I healthy boy!!!  After he got his vitals taken care of and my family got to meet him they wheeled me away to another room.  It was around 11 p.m. by that time.  Brian and Tayton slept in that room with us.  I did not sleep. This was the start of my sleepless nights with my bundle of joy!  I was scared again.  This baby is in my room.  What the heck are all those sounds.  Snorting, his eyes looking all over the place.  Does he need me to do anything?!?  I can't walk yet!  Well I survived the hospital although I thought I was dying due to the fact that my lower region was beat to hell.  My friend said that I would feel like someone hit me with bricks.  She was right.
The next two weeks were challenging.  I couldn't drive.  I slept out on the couch with Cruz in the swing.  I was up every hour at any sound I heard to tend to my new man.  I felt a bit off.  Baby Blues I'm assuming.  Not that I was sad to have a baby but I did have a ton of hormones rushing through my body.  I would cry if Cruz would cry and I couldn't console him.  I would tear up if he was being cute.  I was even emotional at the Johnson and Johnson commercial.  Okay - let's face it. I'm still experiencing all of that except for first two weeks these emotions were magnified.  Then finally I could drive so I drove to my doctor's appointment with Cruz in tow.  He was okay.  I was okay.  We made it.  Although I was scared he would be sad, cry, or even a bit stressed out (let's face it - me too) we made it through.  Each day was more manageable.  I've spent the last 7 weeks and 1 day getting to know my son.  Now I understand him a little more than before.  I have hours that are hard but are rewarded with the new things we are experiencing together.  Over the last two weeks Cruz has been responding to me.  He is smiling even more.  Now he's kicking his legs and opening and closing his hands.  He still has a little gas but I've bought everything on the market to help with that.  I have found that swaddling him, rubbing his stomach, rocking him, saying "shoosh" over and over again, and giving him his "binky" helps him calm down.  He is a great eater. I was very frusterated in the hospital when we were both learning to breast feed.  Now we both have it down.  He does get angry when he's trying to eat.  This just means he's about to burp, spit up, or that he's tired.  We have our 2 month check up next week.  I get on the scale with him and he's about 13.5 pounds.  He outgrew his newborn clothes in about one month.  My litle guy is the light of my life.  I can't wait to share our story together here.  I hope one day he will read my words.  My mom kept a journal for me up until I was in elementry school.  I have read it several times.  I want to document our days together.  I have been posting picutres to Facebook and Instagram and sending videos to all that will watch but now I think this will be our home.  When I first found out I was pregnant 7.9.13 I was so scared.  I wasn't sure if I ever wanted kids.  I hate to admit that but now I know that THIS is what it is all about.  I look into my son's eyes and see so much of me, Brian, my dad, my brother, my Haslip genes.  I see this sweet little boy that I want to protect forever and I will do that with all my heart. 

Thank you friends for reading this and being there for this journey of motherhood with my incredible son! 

More to come!